What can I say


What can I say! as you knwo my SIL lives with us with her kids, she has slowly brainwashed her kids to hate me and my husband!
recently they are just loving her brother, they go there all the time, talk to him all the time. Her son just quit his job so he can go and work for him. and they didn’t even tell me till it happened. I don’t mind that as much as I mind the fact they think they are better than me and they are smarter than me and that they know more and they are making me look like a fool. that is what pisses me off the most. I, who helped you settle in this country, who helped you get jobs, who looked after you when your mother was not here. I am now your enemy? really?
So now it is tax time, I normally do mine and do theirs too. but really why should I? I am not talked to, I am not liked but I should file taxes of them? really? her older daughter is a real bitch and she asked me if I would file for them and I said now. OMG! since then they have all been sulking? really? after you start thinking of me as your enemy and start thinking of me as somebody who doesn’t event deserve your respect or time. why would you want my help? I know it is like cutting my nose off to spite my face, but I am sick of these people and their games. tomorrow my SIL has to put my kids on the bus, if she doesn’t I will tell her she has to move out by the end of the day! I am sick of them thinking they can treat me like crap and that they can get away with it.
I want my house back and my life back and I want these people out of my house!

Changes


A lot of changes going on! my DH is in his home country. The main reason he went is to help his parents. He is one of three sons. He is expected to help his parents in their old age. The oldest son has looked after the parents for the past 3 years. His wife is now here living with us. She won’t go back to look after her husband and her inlaws. Even though her inlaws are related to her! She cant leave her kids to live with us even though they are all over 20yrs old! I was that age when I left my home and moved across the world to live with my husband.
Anyway, wife of the middle son, lives in the home country, but she wont look after them either! she is younger, a lot younger and my BIL got married to he about a year ago and it is his second marriage. She wont look after them either.
Now when my inlaws were able they lived with me and DH, they loved living with us and looked after our kids and loved it. Now they are sick and old and nobody will look after them! I cant beleive it, I was not brought up this way to leave them and ignore them and not look after tham. I feel like everybody is just waiting for them to die!. They have two daughters, but it is not their job to look after them, the sons are meant to look after them.
My MIL is a very touch person, she kills the servants and is never happy with them. She never lets them last! it is very hard. I am praying we can fgure something out and get them some help.
I know the answer would be that I go, I probably would if I could, but I cant live there, I have never lived there and I have a very bad allergy that I could easily die there due to the lack of medical care. DH would not let me go there even if I wanted to. but why should I? why do I have to make the sacrifice everytime? why do me and DH have to look after them, becasue we have the compassion, we cant let them live and die with no help. I cant let that happen. So please pray it works out and we find a solution.

Work Update


One of the main reasons I don’t post as often as I do is because I found a job! I am so thankful to Allah for this job! It is a great job, good people and nice people and good company and I am doing exactly what I am good at and what I love to do. I applied for this job in June and then took about 2 months to get into for an interview. I also got another job that started sooner, so I took the job and accepted this one too. I worked there for 2 weeks but it was a 50mile trip one way to get there and 50 miles to get back. That was too much, the pay was about 2-3 dollar difference. So I decided to take the one that was closer and only a 10 mile commute one way. I am so glad I took this job!
I work with good, nice people, the team is fun and a lot of laughter and joking while we work. Also the best part is I have the best boss ever! I also have the option in the winter to work form home, I have the laptop. So that will be nice to do.
I started getting paid and I got my hair done, unfortunately I can’t wear hijab at work, but I do only wear pants, only wear long sleeve or make it long sleeve with some long sleeve tops under the short sleeve tops. I feel sad that I cant wear the scarf, but I have never see anybody wearing a scarf, it is not the normal thing here yet. This is very unfortunate. However, I do still wear it in my personal life. I get the looks and I sometimes feel like why do I bother, but it is me and it is my religion and I am not going to give it up for people who don’t like it. Some might say why I don’t wear it to work, but I thought long and hard about this and it is a necessary sacrifice I have to make for the greater good of feeding my kids and paying the bills. Inshallah there will be a day I can wear the scarf without any looks.

Work Update


One of the main reasons I don’t post as often as I do is because I found a job! I am so thankful to Allah for this job! It is a great job, good people and nice people and good company and I am doing exactly what I am good at and what I love to do. I applied for this job in June and then took about 2 months to get into for an interview. I also got another job that started sooner, so I took the job and accepted this one too. I worked there for 2 weeks but it was a 50mile trip one way to get there and 50 miles to get back. That was too much, the pay was about 2-3 dollar difference. So I decided to take the one that was closer and only a 10 mile commute one way. I am so glad I took this job!
I work with good, nice people, the team is fun and a lot of laughter and joking while we work. Also the best part is I have the best boss ever! I also have the option in the winter to work form home, I have the laptop. So that will be nice to do.
I started getting paid and I got my hair done, unfortunately I can’t wear hijab at work, but I do only wear pants, only wear long sleeve or make it long sleeve with some long sleeve tops under the short sleeve tops. I feel sad that I cant wear the scarf, but I have never see anybody wearing a scarf, it is not the normal thing here yet. This is very unfortunate. However, I do still wear it in my personal life. I get the looks and I sometimes feel like why do I bother, but it is me and it is my religion and I am not going to give it up for people who don’t like it. Some might say why I don’t wear it to work, but I thought long and hard about this and it is a necessary sacrifice I have to make for the greater good of feeding my kids and paying the bills. Inshallah there will be a day I can wear the scarf without any looks.

Bitches


I live with my sister in law, she is my husbands brothers wife, she has three kids and they are all ranging fron 20-25 yrs old. when they came to live here, we all thought we would all live together, make money together and help each other. we bought a big house that we couldnt afford so we could do this. Then they came over, but their mother had to wait a year, that year in retrospect was the best year we spent, the kids were polite, nice and helped me. I took them to work, enrolled them in school, helped them with everything. A year later their mother came, she has hated me from the day I married my husband, she came here with the purpose of making her kids hate me and be brain washed by her. Well, over the last 3yrs, she has succeded. she has mmade them think we are their enemies, that her family is the best. the oldest daughter tells her mother not to help in the house, not to talk to us. the past three days since we went out and didn’t take them too, she has not talked to me. I have not asked her what the matter is or asked her why she isn’t talking to me. My SIL just has to make one dish a day, the rest of the time she just cooks for her kids, and puts my kids on the bus and off the bus. for this I am paying the bigger price, I have to watch them hide, talk tin whispers, plan things and keep us out of the loop.
I pray Allah gives me the strengths to get through this tough time. To make the time go faster till I can get out of here and make sure what goes around comes around and I hope I am around to see this. I could write a novel about what this bitch and kids get up to, but I have too cook now since she has decided not to and I don’t have the time to waste on these people!

Medifast


am currently doing the Medifast Diet. I have been on is since Dec 1st and so far have lost 10lbs! I think that is a good loss for a month where it is hard to diet and to stay away from the candy and cakes!
The diet is 5 meal replacements and one meal lean and green. It is a good diet and I have had success on it in 2010, I lost about 30lbs on it and then had to stop because I couldn’t afford it and I slowly gained it all back. I am an emotional eater; I eat when stressed, upset, angry and even happy! Since I have started work I consider it my one splurge and I started again on it. I think I am doing well on it, I have a cafeteria here and it makes it a lot easier and painless ! I can chug water at my desk and I get my gallon of water in for the day! There is a coach this time and I am in touch with her. She has asked me to tell her my weight each week and then we can troubleshoot! That is scary! I cant imagine telling anybody my weight. But I think it will be a good thing to do. My work is actually offering Weight Watchers to employees next month and I might try that later in the year, once I get about 50lbs off this way, I can then switch to that. Anyway, taking it one day at a time and inshallah I will lose the weight soon.

Peoples Attitude


Wow!, I cant believe people sometimes. We have family living with us and they often go out, eat out and make pland without inviting us. So today my husbnd decided to take us out and we were out for the whole day. We came back and the family is all giving us the silent treatment!! I cant believe their thinking, when they went out, the would shove it in our faces, so why so upset that we went out?. We have no right?
They will complain when we dont talk to them, but we cant complain if they dont talk to us! So much double standard!! Then one of them posts a post on their facebook saying they cant believe how some people change. Well they all changed when they decided they hated me and didnt want anything to do with me.
The new year has started and there is a lot of change coming the major one will be us moving into our own place and I cant wait!!